How far we've come

Recently I've been reflecting on how powerful music can be. One of the ways in which it can impact us, is helping us to remember and hold onto truths, as those catchy melodies and lyrics get "stuck in our heads".

 

I have been going through a difficult season lately, and there have been certain songs that have been really helping me to hold onto important truths in the middle of everything. In those moments when my mind is so numb that I can't even think straight, a lyric or two of a song can come to me and give me something to hold onto, to ground me. In particular, I have been listening a lot to the latest album called "Trial and triumph" by a band I like called "I am they" (who I thoroughly recommend listening to!). Many of the album's lyrically rich songs speak about the trials and triumphs of life, and some of the things that we need to remember as we go through them.

 

The title track, that has been going through my head all day today, is a song called "How far we've come". It reminds us through every trial and every triumph to stop and look at just how far we've come. And it reminds us that the one who has been faithful to bring us this far, is not going to abandon us now - in fact, through it all He will NEVER let go.

 

This is particularly poignant as we come into the Easter season. For some Easter is just a long weekend, an excuse for a few days off work, with some extra chocolate thrown in for good measure. But, whilst I enjoy all of these things, Easter means much more to me than that. For me, it is the ultimate reminder of just how far God would (and did) go to "not let go of me". When things were at their worst, He sent His son, Jesus, to rescue me, when I was not able to rescue myself. He rescued me from sin, from guilt, from shame, from fear, from a life lived in defeat, and so many other things. And through the act of one man, He showed me how crazily reckless His love is, that He would give up everything to not let me go.

 

The book of Romans in the Bible sums this up nicely, by saying the following (Message translation): "We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him." We had nothing to offer God, and yet He gave everything for us.

 

So whatever you may be going through in this season, this Easter let's stop beating ourselves up about wherever we are right now. Instead, let's look back together and remember just how far we have come (probably further than we realise or remember!). And let's look forward with hope, knowing that there is one who isn't willing to give up on us - not now, or ever; one who is patient, and offers to walk with us through both the trials and the triumphs. And if you haven't yet experienced this love that I speak about, why not accept God's invitation this Easter? I can promise you, it will definitely be the best decision you ever make. He stands at the door of our hearts and knocks, waiting for us to respond. 

How far we've come - I am they

 

Verse 1:

It's hard to believe
This is the same road we started on
Ashes to beauty once again

When we couldn't see
And it all disappeared from under us
He became the ground beneath our feet

Pre-Chorus:
Every step, every struggle
Every triumph, every trial

Chorus:
Look at the mountains we've climbed
Look at how faithful He's been, to deliver us
Look at how far we've come
The story of unfailing love
Jesus has made a way, to deliver us
Look at how far we've come

 

Bridge:

You never let go, You never let go
God, through it all You will never let go

Cave exploration and being like a deer

Introduction: I was recently inspired by a blog post written by a friend of mine...Part of what he wrote was about how we often don't realise the impact that the things we share could have; that we shouldn't let our voice be silenced, because what we share may be just what someone else needs to hear (go and read the original post, because it's written much better than my very brief summary!) So with that in mind, I thought I'd write a new blog post and share some thoughts with you from my holiday in Southern Italy this summer, in the hope that it may be of encouragement to you also. 

The area of Italy that we visited, Puglia (also known as Apulia), contains a number of caves due to the limestone rock in parts of the region. On one of our sightseeing trips, we visited a place called Castellana Grotte, where there is an impressive cave system that you can visit and it is quite a big tourist site. Unfortunately, in order to see these caves, we had many stairs to climb and walkways to traverse, the stones we walked on were very uneven in places and to top it all, it was fairly dark in parts. So at first, I spent quite a bit of time worrying that I was going to fall - particularly given my history of weak joints and twisting/spraining my ankle easily. It took all of my concentration to focus on where my feet were going. Looking down meant that, not only was it hard to appreciate the beauty of the caves around me, but I also ended up feeling really nauseous (it felt like really bad travel sickness!)

 

But then I was reminded of a verse in the Bible, about God making us as surefooted as deer, which blew me away! The verse goes like this:

"The sovereign Lord is my strength! He makes me as surefooted as a deer, able to tread upon the heights" (Hab3:19; NLTtranslation)

In a different translation (the Amplified version) it says this:

"The Lord God is my strength [ my source of courage, my invincible army]; He has made my feet [ steady and sure] like hinds' feet, and makes me walk [forward with spiritual confidence] on high places [of challenge and responsibility]."

A similar verse in Psalm 18 says:

"He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; He causes me to stand on the heights...you provide a broad path for my feet, so that my ankles do not give way." (As you may appreciate, the latter phrase managed to get my attention!)

Now whilst it may seem like mixing metaphors slightly to think about being like a deer walking on the heights when I was 60m underground in a cave, this reminder made me think that perhaps, even though it was counterintuitive, I needed to look up, not down. Looking down wasn't working; I was worrying, not enjoying the trip, missing the beauty around me (which I desperately wanted to see and enjoy!), and I was even making myself ill! But God said that He would make me as surefooted as a deer - I just need to look up and trust Him to take care of my footing, as He said He would, as well as everything else. It was very hard to let go of that feeling of wanting to be in control. But when I did, it meant that I was freer, not constantly worrying, and I was able to better appreciate the beauty of the caves around me, as well as to better appreciate the people around me too. And I didn't fall. Perhaps this is also a picture of how my life should be.

The definitions of surefooted are along the lines of:

- unlikely to stumble or slip
- confident and competent
- able to easily walk on rough ground, without falling
- the ability to negotiate difficult or rough terrain safely.

I particularly find the latter two very interesting. It seems that being surefooted does not mean that the way ahead necessarily becomes smooth, much as we would like it to (the floor in the cave didn't magically change when I stopped looking at it!). But it does mean that even when the ground beneath me is rough (as it will be, at times), I will still be able to walk on it confidently and without hurting myself. I just need to look up, and not down at my feet!

There are other places in the Bible where we see this same principle at work, even though the contexts are slightly different. In one of the letters the apostle Paul wrote to the Corinthian church, he talked about how much pressure he had been under and the hope that he had in God to deliver him:

"We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about the trouble we experienced in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us again. On him we have set our hope, that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers" (2Cor1:8-11).

I also love Psalm 124, that talks about how overwhelmed the Israelites would have been...IF God had not been on their side. It reminds us that God is our help.

I could go on, there are so many other similar passages that have been coming to mind of late. Notably there is also the story of Peter walking on the water, and how he only started sinking when he started looking down at the waves and at the storm around him. But when he kept his eyes fixed on Jesus ahead of him, he was able to overcome and to walk on the waves (completely impossible in the natural!) You should read the whole story if you aren't familiar with it, it's pretty amazing.

I am also facing a number of challenging circumstances at the moment, in several different areas of life. And these come on top of already having a fairly full life, with numerous responsibilities. The very real temptation is to look at all of these things and to get overwhelmed by them and wonder how I will cope. And yet, "this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness" (Lam3:23). God promises that if we make the hard decision to look up at him, He will keep us from being overwhelmed. We may encounter situations where we feel hard pressed, but we will not be crushed. He will make us surefooted like those deer, able to traverse those difficult places where it should be impossible for us to walk. HE will be the one who directs our steps. And in the process He will give us a hope to cling to, He will enable us to see the beauty around us, like I did in those Italian caves, and we will see him at work in incredible ways that we would otherwise not get to see, in both our lives and the lives of those around us. It will be worth it. And when we walk like this, perhaps we will also be able to grab hold of those who are struggling around us, no longer at risk of being dragged down by their struggles but able to reach out to them and teach them to also look up.

A song that I have listened to many times, but is inspiring me afresh at the moment, is the song "God I look to You" by Bethel Music. It is a great song of declaration about this very topic - of looking up and not being overwhelmed. Have a listen, and I hope it inspires you too.

 
God I look to You - Bethel Music

 

Verse:
God I look to You, I won't be overwhelmed
Give me vision to see things like You do
God I look to You, You're where my help comes from
Give me wisdom; You know just what to do

Chorus:

I will love You Lord my strength
I will love You Lord my shield
I will love You Lord my rock
Forever, all my days, I will love You God

Bridge:

Hallelujah our God reigns
Hallelujah our God reigns
Hallelujah our God reigns
Forever, all my days, hallelujah!

Rocks and sand

Recently we celebrated the start of another new year. People often use this time as a chance to reflect on the year that has been (2016), and to dream about the year to come (2017). I saw one blog post that someone had written about their biggest fear for 2017 - that nothing was going to change and everything would stay as it had been, rather than the new year bringing the hoped-for fresh start. However, whilst I sympathise with the sentiment, as I have been reflecting, I have come to the opposite conclusion - that for me, one of my biggest fears for 2017, is knowing that lots of things ARE about to change (some of which have already started shifting at the end of 2016).

Since leaving home for University, I have moved around a lot and lived in a number of different towns/cities, in a number of different houses within those places, been part of a number of different churches and made a number of amazing friends. Whilst many elements of this have been good, it has also made me anxious to settle somewhere (probably the nesting instinct coming out!) And indeed, I have now lived in my current town (and been in my current job) for longer than any of the other previous places I have lived (other than the places where I grew up). My current job is permanent (at least, for as long as they want to keep me!), and I own a house, both of which add to the illusion of greater permanence. The problem with this, is that whilst I am not necessary completely satisfied with everything about where I am right now, I also find that I have unknowingly let myself become comfortable here, finding security in the (mostly) predictable nature of things around me.

But it is only an illusion of security, sinking sand if you like. Jesus told a story about two men, one of whom built a house on a rock and one of whom built a house on the sand. Unsurprisingly, when the storms came the house on the sand fell (there are many great kids songs about this, with amazing actions and sound effects!), but the house on the firm foundation of the rock continued to stand firm. The more I get to know Jesus, the more I come to know that he didn't just tell us things for the sake of it, to just fill the time with some nice stories to make us feel better, and he didn't tell us things in order to make our lives harder or boring. He actually told us things in order that we really might have life in all its fullness. When the storms aren't around, the sand actually looks like a pretty good location to build a house - why go to all the bother of building a firm foundation, the house on the sand looks just fine from the outside. The problem is only evident when the storms come (and they do come). If we build our lives on things of this earth, even though they may look good, and stable, they are only fleeting and we find that if we have built our house there, it will eventually fall into ruin - what happens if you lose that job? Or end that relationship?  Or I lose the ability to do certain things that I used to love? What then?

But there is good news. Jesus says that if we build our house (our lives) on the rock, then even when the storms come, we will not be shaken. But what is this rock? Well, the God that I know and believe in, claims to be that rock. He is the only one who is unchanging in this world of change, my rock, the only firm foundation. His attributes and character also never change: He is always love; He is always good, and we can always depend upon Him. God wants us to depend on Him in this way, not to kill our fun or make life hard, but actually to protect us, that we might still be able to stand even in a world full of uncertainty and change; He wants us to live lives that are solid, lives of integrity, lives that don't get blown this way and that with the changing seasons. But we don't do this because we've got everything all figured out - no, it's because we're depending on the rock, the reason we can stand firm.

The process of learning this lesson in practice is not proving to be an easy one, but in the long run our lives will be better for it if we do. In 2017, a year promising to be full of change, I want to choose not to live in fear any more, but I want to turn and find my security in God my rock. He will never let me down, and with my life built on Him, I will never be shaken.

This is a song that has been encouraging me a lot lately:

Jon Guerra - Wherever you are

Verse:

You can take the train or you can take the car,
You can travel the world but not too get too far.

You are always just where you are.

Why don’t you wanna be where you are?

I can see you’re sad, I can see you’re down

You think you’re lost and cannot be found

Love will find you just where you are

Why don’t you wanna be where you are?

Chorus:

Wherever you go, he is there

No matter the steep hill or stair

He doesn’t leave you alone with your prayers 

He is as close to you friend

As your own heart beat or breath

Believe you are loved

And that he is enough

For whatever you’re in

You know that he’s been

Wherever you are

Verse 2:

When you’re head is spinning and your life’s a race

When you try so hard but you get last place

Sometimes you are just where you are

Love doesn’t leave you where you are

Bridge:

There is no height, there is no distance

That can separate your heart from his

He knows exactly where you’ve been

And he loves you

Child he loves you

So come out, come out, come out wherever you are

 

Happy New Year (a new thing)

So, it's nearly 2014! Another new year! There are always mixed reactions to celebrating New Year, but I’ve really noticed it this year more than ever, due partly to having quite a few friends who have had a really tough time of it in 2013. I can see their view point…there is definitely a lot of expectation put on the one evening of New Year’s Eve, and if 2013 has been a tough year (which I know it has been for many of you) then why indeed would you want to celebrate its passing (at least, with anything more than sheer relief!) My natural optimistic instinct is to just want to give the people concerned a great big hug, tell them that somehow it’s going to be ok, and to want to make everything better for them – I don’t like knowing that people are hurting (it makes me hurt too!) But, it turns out that I can’t just magically make things better with optimism, no matter how hard I try to think of the right things to do or say.

The good news though, is that I can do something much better. Firstly, I can continue to pray for you. And secondly, I can share with you what I know of the hope that is based on solid promises, rather than optimism – and I happen to trust the one who has made those promises (although, I don’t trust Him nearly as much as I want to or know I should – but that’s a whole different blog post!)

Most of you will by now know that Steven Curtis Chapman is one of my favourite singer-songwriters (for various reasons, which I won’t go into here). He has written this song called Happy new Year, which is at the end of his latest Christmas album. It ends with hope for the year to come:
“The God who made everything, is remaking everything.
The God who made everything, He says I’m making all things new”.

This ties in amazingly with Bible Gateway’s verse of the day for today (which I get delivered to my inbox every day):
"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43: 18-19.

Now this prophecy was written to a people who had really had a tough time of it. They, of all people, would have had a reason to “dwell in the past” and on the “former things”. Yet, they are given this promise to hold onto, to look and see that God is doing a new thing: He is making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland – i.e. bringing life to places that were formerly only places of death, where anything other than death seemed like an impossibility. Some of 2013 may have looked like a wilderness or a wasteland to you, and you aren't sure how things could ever get better. But, with God, nothing is impossible. I had no idea how I was going to find a job after completing my PhD at the end of last year (or what that job should even be), but God found me one. Then, I had no idea how to find somewhere to live in my new town, this place I didn't know at all - but God found me somewhere. I had no idea how to find a new church family to connect into - but God found me an amazing one(!) You get the picture. (There are still plenty more difficult situations that have yet to be resolved, but I know that my God will somehow make a way!) 

I also think of a passage in another Old Testament book of the Bible:
“I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:19-23

God’s compassions are new not just every year, but every day (and actually, also every moment of every day!) The coming of a new year just gives us a good chance to stop and reflect. Yes it is a chance to remember with thanks the good things from 2013. But it is also a chance to remember that however hard 2013 has been, we don’t have to get stuck there and dwell in the things now from our past, but we can move on, with hope and expectation, into all that the future brings – that God is doing a new thing.

Up until fairly recently I found it really hard to think about the future. I suppose it was a result of the (mostly self-imposed) pressure of having to choose “the perfect” subjects for GCSE (then for A-level, then for university, then for a job…the list goes on; I don’t know if anyone else can relate to this?!) I used to look into the future and just get paralysed with fear, so it was easier not to look there at all, and just go with the flow of what was happening right now, but without any goals or direction (because that would involve thinking about the future!) But I have been, and am still being, more and more freed from this paralysing fear, such that I can now look at the future. I still don’t know what’s ahead, and it still scares me a bit, but whatever lies ahead, I know the One who walks beside me  (and I know that he has also placed some amazing people around me, for me to also walk with and encourage/ be encouraged by!) And I know that 2014 will be a good year. I was challenged a few weeks ago to think about what my expectations were for 2014. I didn’t have an answer at the time, but I think I do now (at least partly). What are your expectations for 2014?

So, Happy New Year, and every blessing for the year ahead :)

Declaration of Dependence

Leadership is a funny thing.  We think of leaders as the ones up front, forging ahead, being strong, always knowing what they are doing. 

At the moment I am being asked to step into various leadership roles, such as leading worship at church on a Sunday morning.  Now, being up front would normally be the last place I would choose to put myself – I far prefer hiding away in a corner where no one can see me, but apparently God has other ideas about where He wants to put me!  (This relates back to a previous post about how, even though following God may at times be scary and can take me to places where I wouldn’t choose to put myself, it’s the only place I want to be, as I want to be where He is and where He’s taking me!)  I mean, this very weekend last year I was part of a band playing to a large crowd of people at the Washington Folk Festival, and now tomorrow, here I will be again in front of lots of people, leading worship – neither of which I regret at all, I’m being stretched, but neither of which would I have thought to place myself in!

The thing is though, the thing that I have to keep reminding myself of daily at the moment, is that actually it isn’t about me.  My temptation is to look at myself and feel terrified as I do not at all feel up to the job being asked of me!  Yes I know that I have developed certain musical skills over the years and I have led worship before (just not in main church), but in the moment I still feel scared, and it all feels a bit overwhelming to be honest!  But that is what happens when I look at myself and my own abilities. 

When I choose to fix my eyes on God instead, what happens is that I begin to realise that He is actually the one who is working through me!  I just do my bit, (preparing songs, practising, praying…), and then I have to just trust and leave the rest up to Him, trusting that He has a plan and He knows what He’s doing (even when my feelings are still wondering what He’s thinking, using me at all!) 

There is this wonderful passage in the Bible which I’ve been reading of late, where Jesus says:

“Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.

Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.”  John15:4-5    

My tendency, and I think our tendency in general as a culture, is to want to be self-sufficient; to not have to rely on anyone.  Everything around us shouts this to us, how we need to learn to stand on our own two feet.  To us, the word dependency has acquired somewhat of a negative connotation!  To us, it implies weakness (which we don’t like to admit to), and a lack of confidence in ourselves and our own abilities.  But, this doesn’t stop our deep desire for something to trust in and hold onto. On one hand we want to do things our own way and be independent, yet we still end up turning to things and people to fill something in us – be it a reliance on an iphone or ipad, or be it a need to meet with a friend every week, or even a need to have a girlfriend or boyfriend to “complete us”; whatever it is.  Newton Faulkner sums this position up beautifully in his song “I need something”.  He sings:

“I need something to believe in

Cos I don't believe in myself
I'm sick and tired of getting nowhere
Guess it'll all work out

And I don't mind anymore

And I don't mind anymore

And I need someone to put my trust in

Cos I ain't trusting myself
And I'm scared of failure
So scared of success
Guess it'll all work out”

As he says, deep down, we know what we’re really like.  We’re actually scared to trust in ourselves, and we put on this confident front before other people yet inside we feel like frauds, and are scared what would happen if people found out what we were really like.  And we can end up just coping out, and trying to tell ourselves that we don’t care anymore, and we try to persuade ourselves that surely it will just all work out?  (When actually, inside, perhaps we do still care, but have just given up hope, that it actually will work out?!)

Yet through this passage about vines and branches the Bible says dependency on someone other than ourselves is actually how it’s meant to be, but that we’re meant to be dependent on our creator, and not in ourselves or in all these other things; it’s the natural way of things.  Using the example that Steven Curtis Chapman explores in his song "Declaration of Dependence", a flower doesn’t say to the sky: “you know, I just don’t need this sun you give me, or this rain; I can grow on my own thanks very much”.  Just like a branch doesn’t cut itself off from the life-giving vine and then expect to produce fruit on its own.  We find that it’s actually when we learn what it means to be dependent again, but really and truly dependent in the right person, that that’s when life runs through us and fruit is produced.  When we learn to trust in God more and more, and learn to abide in Him, that’s when His love, and life, and goodness and grace can flow all the more through us.  I want to be that person; I want to learn to trust Him more and let Him work through me.  My fears just serve to hold me back and actually get in the way.  Although, having said this, perhaps some nervousness is still a good thing – as it reminds me that actually, I’m not doing this in my own strength, but in the life-giving strength of the true vine.  Yet, I can also be completely confident, knowing that it’s not up to me to make things happen!  How freeing is that :)  I want to sing, no, I want to shout “my declaration of dependence on the one who gave His life for me.”  (And the most awesome thing is that, actually, we find we aren’t frauds at all – God sees the very deepest parts of who we are, and yet STILL He chooses to love us and to work through us; how awesome is that?!!! :)  Oh, and also, it actually is gonna be alright.

Great Expectations

I’ve been thinking lately (dangerous, I know ;) about expectations, and what it means to live life as an expectant person. 

I have heard many times, that we should live full of expectancy.  There are many examples, such as the fact that in life in general we should go into our day, not with resignation that it’s just another day to survive through, but that each new day is an opportunity to grow, to walk with God, and to see Him do amazing things; if only we’re on the lookout for it.  Also, it is often said that we should come to church with expectant hearts for what God is going to do – not coming because it’s “just another service, and it’s what I do on a Sunday”. 

This is backed up by many places in the Bible that talk about expectancy.  For example James1:5-8:

"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord."

or Luke11:9-13

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.

Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”

Now, I know that I should be expectant in theory, but what does it look like in practise?  In reality, sticking with the example of a church service, I can often come on a Sunday morning either in a place of discouragement, just coming on autopilot a bit, or in a place where I’m so excited about what God’s doing.  (And often places in between too, but let’s stick to looking at the 2 extremes for now.)  You’d think that it’s when I come in excitement that that will be when I hear from God the most.  In fact, I often find it to be quite the opposite.  It’s often when I come expecting nothing, that I find God picks me up and encourages me, and then perhaps challenges me with something new, so I learn a lot!  In contrast, it’s often those times when I “think” I am coming with an expectant heart that I can leave feeling a bit disappointed, feeling like God hasn’t met those expectations.  So, what’s going on?

I think the key is that I only “think” I am coming with an expectant heart; I think that there is a difference between being expectant and expecting God to work in a certain way.  If I come to something with wrong expectations, then actually, perhaps it shouldn’t be all that surprising that I can feel disappointed if those expectations aren’t met!  If I have wrong expectations, actually perhaps that makes it harder for me to hear God, as all of my thoughts and plans get in the way, and He has to push through those first before I can hear.  The problem is that this is so subtle.  I don’t intentionally come to church with the wrong expectations, it’s just that in my need to plan things and know what is coming next, I don’t like stopping at just being expectant, but often my heart progresses to wondering what could happen – for example, if I’ve been excited about something lately, I could end up going expectant that I’ll hear some more on this subject, when in fact God may have something completely different that He wants to tell me today!

What particularly brought this home was something I was reading last week.  At breakfast-time each day I’m currently re-reading this amazing book called "Walking with God", by John Eldredge.  In the section I read that morning, it said:

“Our day-to-day grind isn’t anything close to Eden, and our hurting and desperate hearts look for something to which we can attach all those yearnings.  We’ll settle for a doughnut if that’s all there is to look forward to.  We have to be careful what we give our hearts over to.”

Now, that isn’t to say that using specific things to motivate ourselves is necessarily all bad in itself (i.e. I have an essay due in, I’ll look forward to the fact that if I work hard I can go out this evening…)  I think the problem comes when we lean on those things as the only thing that gets us through the day!  What then happens when those things get taken away from us and our hopes are dashed?  What do we do if for some reason I don’t have time to eat that doughnut after all or someone else eats it instead of me?  Or that friend can’t actually meet up with me in the end and has to cancel?  What then? 

What are we choosing to put our daily hope in?  The Bible also says that the Lord delights in those who put their hope in his unfailing love.  Other verses on this topic:

“But I trust in Your unfailing love.  I will rejoice because you have rescued me” (Psalm13:5, NLT)

“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you.  Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.”  (Psalm143:8, NIV)

 “Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”  (Lamentations3:21-23)

And these aren't just fluffy thoughts, for when everything in life is going well.  If you read them in context, most of these Psalms were written by King David when he was in the midst of really hard situations!  It is a principle for both the good and the tough times.

There’s also this great hymn (“Solid Rock”), which has recently been revived by Hillsong (and entitled Cornerstone):

“My hope is built on nothing less

Than Jesus blood and righteousness
I did not trust the sweetest frame
But wholly trust in Jesus name”

The conclusion that I’m slowly coming to, is that actually, what it comes down to, is that as we learn to stand more and more on God’s promises and what He says is true, as we align ourselves daily with who He says He is and who we therefore are, as we daily surrender our plans, hopes and dreams into His hands, and as we place our hopes solely in his unfailing and unchanging love, then we will be free to more and more be able to hear his heartbeat for our day, for a church service, just for everything in life; We will come with the right expectations!

And we will be able to choose to SEE.  Mary Beth Chapman (the wife of Steven Curtis Chapman) has written this incredible book, "Choosing to See", which talks really honestly about how her life really hasn’t gone in the direction she planned (she wanted a nice, organised, scheduled life, but instead ended up married to a Grammy-winning singer-songwriter with crazy touring schedules, and as the mum to 6 kids – one of whom is now in heaven, as of 2008).  But she takes us with her on her journey, of how she’s been learning to SEE what God is doing.  I think that’s so it – that we need to not be disappointed by what has or hasn’t happened (and we most definitely need to not let that put us off from continuing to be expectant!), but we instead need to choose to SEE what God IS doing, even when it doesn’t necessarily match up with what I would like Him to be doing.  Or we at least need to be willing to see.

I most definitely don’t have this sorted in my head or heart yet, (I am again thinking aloud), and I would definitely be interested in hearing what you think.  But for now, I’ll just finish with the words of another SCC song, Great Expectations:

“The morning finds me here at heaven's door

A place I've been so many times before
Familiar thoughts and phrases start to flow
And carry me to places that I know so well
But dare I go where I don't understand
And do I dare remember where I am
I stand before the great eternal throne
The one that God Himself is seated on

And I, I've been invited as a son
Oh I, I've been invited to come and ...

Believe the unbelievable

Receive the inconceivable
And see beyond my wildest imagination
Lord, I come with great expectations.

So wake the hope that slumbers in my soul

Stir the fire inside and make it glow
I'm trusting in a love that has no end
The Saviour of this world has called me friend
And I, I've been invited with the Son
Oh I, I've been invited to come and ...

We've been invited with the Son

And we've been invited to come and ...

Believe the unbelievable

Receive the inconceivable
And see beyond our wildest imagination
Lord, we come with great expectations” 

re:creation

As is the current theme at the moment, this morning I was reading something and it gave completely new life to a concept that I thought I understood, yet I find that I didn’t really at all.  (It is also pretty topical considering the baptisms at church this Saturday!)  This concept is recreation.  It’s the topic of SCC's latest album (I just couldn’t resist working some more of his songs into blog posts :) and more seriously, is actually something I have been thinking about lately. 

2 Corinthians 5:17 in the Bible says:

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”   

Now, this is considered a pretty crucial verse for Christians, yet it’s one that is so easy to skim past without realising the full implications: If we know Christ and are IN him, then we are a new creation; not just the old one redone a bit to make it look better, but a completely new creation!  How crazy is that?!

Now the Bible also says that we are to be transformed by the renewing of our minds.  This implies that our minds weren’t automatically renewed when we were made new; so although we ARE new, we can sometimes slip back into old patterns of thought, because our minds are still being renewed.  But, when we hold firm to the promises of God, this isn’t just positive thinking; we believe that these promises really are true, even though they don’t feel like it sometimes.  And I have a legitimate right to tell those old negative feelings, thoughts and fears to go away and leave me alone, because I am a new creation, and they no longer have a place in my life!  I just need to keep renewing my mind to be in line with that.

But even more exciting than this (if that were possible!) is that this isn’t the end of the story.  It isn’t just that we’ve been recreated, and are now free from so many things that held us in bondage, and that’s it.  Voila.  No.  This is only the start of the story.  We’re Only Getting Started.

In another part of the Bible it says:

“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. “(Ephesians 2:10)

This is the NLT (New Living Translation) version of the Bible.  I have never really understood this verse; until last night/today.  Sometimes reading several different translations of the Bible helps me to get to the bottom of what a verse really means.  I tend to mostly read the NIV (New International Version), but in the NIV this verse can lose some of its meaning, as it merely says that “we are created in Christ to…”  I know the “in Christ” should probably have given me a clue, but I still missed the point.  The point isn’t that we were created merely so that we could do stuff.  No, I think it’s that we were RECREATED in order to then be set free to do the things that God has for us to do. 

Now, that may sound like just a lot of hard work, doing the things that God has for us to do, and I guess sometimes it may be.  But the truth is (or seems to be as I am starting to re-understand it anyway!) that God has good plans for us.  He has gifted each of us with things, and put us in places where he has “good works” that only we can do (through him of course).  Another SCC song on his re:creation album says:

“You were meant to be touching the lives that you touch,

And meant to be here making this world so much more
Than it would be, without you in it.

You were meant to be bringing the gifts that you bring,

And singing the songs you’ve been given to sing.
You are perfectly, wonderfully, beautifully meant to be,
You were meant to be.”

Wow!  Clearly the line about singing songs particularly speaks to me :)  The problem comes though, that there is so much stuff in our lives that can prevent us from becoming all of this.  (The Bible would call a lot of it sin, and uses some quite strong imagery to speak about how this sin holds us in slavery).  The good news, is that through what Jesus did we can be created anew, and set free from all the rubbish that holds us back.  Then, as we are free to walk where he wants us to go, we can then be all that he has for us to be and do all that he purposed for us to do, which is a good thing! 

And this very much relates back to my earlier post about the Great Adventure too, and how, being where God is and where he wants us to be is actually the best place to be (and does not involve us just “trying harder”.)  Yes, it may often be scary (as I’m also discovering), as he takes us places that may be out of our “comfort zones”, but I also just don’t want to live my life any other way; I want to be where he is!  And I really want to continue to learn about who I now really am - this new creation, who doesn’t have to be weighted down by fears and failings anymore (a bit of a novel feeling really!) - and continue to learn how to live in light of that. 

Please know that I’m not saying any of this with the intention to “preach” at anyone; I am merely thinking out loud.  Writing helps me to process things and, although I know we are all at different places, in making this public on a blog my hope is that it might give you some things to think about too. 

“Sing with elation, praise every morning, God’s recreation of the new day.”   
- From the song Morning Has Broken

(p.s. aren’t you impressed with how I managed to work 3 SCC songs AND an album title into 1 blog post!  Ok, 1 of them was only sort-of an SCC song.  Still, I wonder how many I’ll manage to fit in next time :-)

The Great Adventure

So, last night was the night I finally went to see Steven Curtis Chapman live in concert at the Hammersmith Apollo.  I had been excited about this for months as I have loved SCC’s music for years and have always wanted to see him live, but this is the first time that I’ve had the chance to see him live in the UK! 

The evening didn’t disappoint; in fact, it was so much more amazing than I could have imagined.  SCC and Michael W Smith (who he was touring with) are both phenomenal musicians.  I was singing along to every SCC song and there were just so many amazing moments that one blog post could not do it justice.  So, rather than trying to summarise the evening, I’m instead going to focus on one key thought that struck me afresh yesterday.

Yesterday morning at church, Tim had been speaking about how we need to be people who are constantly pushing forward, and how the moments we sit back are the times when we in fact get dragged backwards.  (Have a listen !)

Now, this is a concept that I’ve been struggling with this week (which is why yesterday was interesting timing!)  If I’m honest, I don’t like the concept of always pushing onwards.  My reaction is: “yes, but what about being content?  Enjoying what God has given to us?”  I can also feel like I’ve already had quite enough of challenges and I’d quite like to stay where I am for a while, to rest and recoup a while before the next thing please! 

But, yesterday afternoon I realised the problem: it isn’t with the concept, but with my way of thinking.  My problem is that I equate pushing forward with striving harder.  I constantly put such pressure on myself to be a better person: to work harder, to please this and that person, to be a better friend, the list goes on…But, although there is nothing intrinsically wrong with any of these things in themselves (friends are amazing, and of course I want to do well at my work...), me constantly striving harder just ends up leaving me feeling exhausted and is what leaves me feeling like I’ve had enough.

Yet, that isn’t what the Bible says at all.  The Bible doesn’t say: “work harder and you’ll gain eternal life!”  In fact, it says that no matter how hard we try we can never be good enough.  When we just keep trying harder, we will always feel far from the standards set by ourselves, by society and by a perfect God.  We will never fulfil them on our own!  But what is amazing, is that the Bible says that Jesus IS life, and we just have to change our way of thinking and come to Him!  It's about Him, not us!  Now, this is something I “know”, but I think that often I nevertheless continue to live as if it all depends on me!

Now, getting back to SCC, I was struck particularly by 2 of his songs last night – songs that I know inside out, and yet I saw new things in them that I hadn’t seen before.

In For the sake of the call he writes:

“Empty nets lying there at the water’s edge
Told a story that few could believe and none could explain
How some crazy fishermen agreed to go where Jesus led
With no thought for what they would gain
For Jesus had called them by name and they answered”

“Drawn like the rivers are drawn to the sea
No turning back, for the water cannot help but flow
Once we hear the Saviour's call we'll follow wherever he leads
Because of the love He has shown
And because he has called us to go we will answer”

“Not for the sake of a creed or a cause
Not for a dream or a promise
Simply because it is Jesus who calls
And if we believe we'll obey”

Now, rivers don’t say “well, I just don’t feel like flowing today” and they certainly don’t have to strive harder to flow, they just do, it’s the way of things and they can’t help it. 

In The great adventure (one of SCC's best known songs) it says:

“I saw a big frontier in front of me and I heard somebody say "let's go"!

Saddle up your horses we've got a trail to blaze
Through the wild blue yonder of God's amazing grace
Let's follow our leader into the glorious unknown
This is a life like no other - this is The Great Adventure”

The song isn’t called “The Great Slog”, but “The Great Adventure”, and the key to this adventure is following our leader, Jesus!  Pushing forward doesn’t mean trying harder and exhausting ourselves, but simply following wherever Jesus goes, and being where He wants us to be; because we love Him and want to be where He is and because He loves us, has a plan, and He knows the best place for us to be (even if His ways may often seem strange to us at the time!)  Jesus Himself said that He only did what He saw His father doing, (rather than running off here, there and everywhere trying to make things work as he saw best!) 

It also ties in with this passage that we were looking at recently on a course that I am doing:
"2 The one who enters by the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. 3 The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. 4 When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice." John10:2-4

Now don’t get me wrong, I know that this means that we will be challenged, and that hard work will often be involved.  But, it's about where the motivation is coming from; knowing that we just have to follow Jesus takes the pressure off ourselves, and we know that we don’t have to dread life, but we should instead be excited about it, and about where God is going!  All we have to do, is to work out what this looks like for each of us in practise – learning to trust in Him and follow Him.  After all, this is the Great Adventure!

p.s. have you spotted the themes with the recent post titles lately ;-)

Another year older !

So, today I am another year older ! I've been having a really great birthday so far, having spent time with family this weekend, and played lots of music yesterday, and I will be celebrating with friends tomorrow evening! But most importantly, for me every birthday is a time when I celebrate again how amazing God is ! I wonder at the fact that He's taken care of me and loved me for thus many years, even when I wasn't aware of it or when I forget, and that He's going to continue to walk beside me and love me into the future. I've recently gotten Vicky Beeching's latest album, "Painting the Invisible", and listening to it the last song on the album really sums up how I feel today (and have been feeling in the run up to my birthday). I quote the lyrics for you below (the song is originally entitled "Twenty-Six summers", but when I play it on guitar I change the lyrics slightly...)

"I don't know what the future holds
Or what lies beyond my horizon
The years ahead are just out of sight
Well, I think sometimes that You hide them
So that I'll walk by faith not sight
So I'll take Your hand, holding tight

Through twenty-four summers
And twenty-four winters
I've laughed in the springtime
I've cried in the rain
Though I've questioned the meaning
Of some of life's seasons
It's true that they've left me holding on
Tighter to You

My one desire for the road ahead
Is that we would walk it together
Friend and King, You're my everything
May I stay by Your side forever
For when my heart's afraid, You're near
Whispering to my soul, 'don't fear'

Through twenty-four summers
And twenty-four winters
I've laughed in the springtime
I've cried in the rain
Though I've questioned the meaning
Of some of life's seasons
It's true that they've left me holding on
Tighter to You

And I will trust in You alone
For You're the hand leading me home
Leading me home.

I've spent twenty-four summers
And twenty-four winters with You
Through all of the seasons
And my search for reasons
You've carried me through

These twenty-four summers
And twenty-four winters
I've laughed in the springtime
I've cried in the rain
Though I've questioned the meaning
Of some of life's seasons
It's true that they've left me holding on
Tighter to You

I will keep holding on to You"

- Twenty-Six Summers
off the album "Painting the Invisible" by Vicky Beeching
(slight lyrics changes in italics mine)

You're where my heart is satisfied

"You're where my heart is satisfied
Apart from You there is no other
When I'm with You I am home
So as I come to know You more
Lord grip my heart and make it Yours

Hold me in Your arms Lord
So close I'd never leave
Let me worship at Your feet
My tears will be my offering
Though I run from You my God
Your love is always drawing me
My life is found in You
That's where I want to be

God have mercy on Your child
The one who bears Your name
For chasing not Your heart
Just going on my way
I want to fall in love with You Lord
And only see Your face
So as I come to see You more
Lord grip my heart and make it Yours"

- Dan Whiteman,
taken from the Vineyard album Unspoken Truth

Make them go away

I'm on the mailing list of Oliver Gearing, an amazing musician I met once whilst performing at an open mic night in Cambridge. Anyway, since I'm on his mailing list I get to hear about all he gets up to, and he recently sent out the following e-mail about the use of one of his songs...


"Breaking news: Make them Go Away has been selected by The Department for Children, Families and Schools to feature in their latest anti-bullying campaign. The song forms the backbone for poignant short film created by Nick Webber and his team at Take One Productions
Currently being distributed to schools across the UK, you can watch it now at olivergearing.com

I am delighted to be involved in such a good cause and thought provoking campaign."



I've just watched the video and would recommend watching it - although, don't watch it unless you're prepared to be challenged. The song is good, of course, but the film is very moving. It moved me to tears anyway.

There's so much wrong in this world, and sometimes one feels overwhelmed and helpless to know what one can do to make any difference at all ! Although, I do know that because of Jesus there is hope...we can make a difference, not in our own strength but by learning how to be his body and hands on this earth. I'm not trying to preach, just trying to be real as I'm struggling to work out my reactions to stuff in life. I didn't have this in mind when I started this post, but oh well...it seems appropriate to post the lyrics of another Ginny Owens song I have been impacted by in the past, which me starting this post brought to mind. The song is basically talking about various people from the Bible (who, were actually real people like us too!), and how some of the stuff God asked them to do seemed so overwhelmingly huge, yet God just asked them to be obedient and to trust in Him; that He had a plan and would use us to "show them I Am". Seems relevant in many ways:

"No Lord, he said, you've got the wrong guy.
Simple conversation gets me tongue-tied.
And you're telling me to speak with a maniac king.
Could it be I've lost my mind?
And besides, I am weak, don't you want someone strong,
To lead them out of Egypt when they've been there so long?
And anyway, they wont believe You ever spoke to me.
That's not your problem, God replied.
And the rest is history.

There's a bigger picture you can't see.
You don't have to change the world, just trust in me.
'Cause I am your creator, I am working out my plan,
And through you I will show them, I Am.

Now Lord, are you sure? He's just a shepherd boy,
Too small for battle gear with a giant to destroy.
What on earth can he do with five stones and a sling?
That's not your problem, God replied.
'Cause I can do anything.

There's a bigger picture you can't see.
You don't have to change the world, just trust in me.
'Cause I am your creator, I am working out my plan,
And through you, I will show them,
I Am the first, I Am the last,
I Am the present and the past,
I Am tomorrow and today,
I Am the only way.

Great Lord, she said, I'm just a simple girl.
You say that I will bring your son into the world.
How can I understand this thing You're gonna do?
That's not your problem, God replied.

'Cause, there's a bigger picture,
And you don't have to change the world.
I'm your creator, I am working out my plan.
And through you, I will show them,
There is a bigger picture, you can't see.
You don't have to change the world, just trust in me.
I'm your creator, I am working out my plan,
And through you, I will show them, I Am."
- I Am by Ginny Owens

Sorry for rambling (again) - it's late, I'm tired, that's my excuse ! Having said that, I need some sleep now (and to finish my work for tonight, which is the reason I'm on the internet in the first place!) Before I do, let me commend the rest of Oliver Gearing's music to you. You can download most (if not all?) his music for free from his website, as cited above. Enjoy and goodnight !

p.s. I don't know why the song lyrics format has lost all the formatting between preview and posting...I hope you can still read it, but I'm too tired now to try and mess around sorting it out. I'll try and sort it out another day.

Wholly Yours

My new favourite album at the moment is "A Collision" by David Crowder band (which my brother got me for Christmas). I love David Crowder band; they're amazing musicians who aren't afraid to experiment with music and generally with art. Their albums aren't just a series of songs one after the other (although in some senses they are of course), they are very cleverly put together and lead you on a journey. Because of that, maybe they aren't quite as accessible on first glance but they allow you to think and explore. This album, as described on the back of the album booklet: "...for the past two years we have ended most nights in concert with the following statement: 'when our depravity meets His divinity it is a beautiful collision.' This recording is about that collision. It is the collision of our fallen state and our Maker's transcendance. It is a rendering of our mortality and eternal life." The song below particularly struck me on first listening, and does so again every time I hear it. The lyrics are just so beautiful ! Very cleverly crafted, and so true. So I thought I'd share them with you. Take time to ponder on them and enjoy. I wish you all a Happy New Year. May you this year know more the awe and wonder of this beautiful collision. Ro xx


"I am full of earth. You are heaven's worth.
I am stained with dirt, prone to depravity.
You are everything, that is bright and clean,
The antonym of me, You are divinity.
But a certain sign of grace is this:
From the broken earth, flowers come up
Pushing through the dirt

You are holy, holy, holy,
All heaven cries, "Holy, holy God."
You are holy, holy, holy.
I want to be holy like You are.

You are everything that is bright and clean
And You're covering me with Your majesty.
And the truest sign of grace was this:
From wounded hands redemption fell down,
Liberating man

You are holy, holy, holy,
All heaven cries, "Holy, holy God."
You are holy, holy, holy.
I want to be holy like You are.

But the harder I try the more clearly can I
Feel the depth of our fall and the weight of it all.
And so this might be the most impossible thing:
Your grandness in me making me clean.

Glory, hallelujah
Glory, glory, hallelujah

So here I am all of me
Finally everything.
Wholly, wholly, wholly
I am wholly, wholly, wholly
I am wholly, wholly, wholly Yours.
I am full of earth and dirt and You."
-David Crowder 2005 (from A Collision)


p.s. chords for this song are in Soul Survivor book 4. And if, like me, you like linking songs together, then you'll be glad to hear that this is another song which you can easily link with 'The stand', 'inside out', 'awesome God', 'mighty to save', etc. via the chorus and bridge.

You know you've been on the woodies year team when...

-when you can tell, just by scanning around a room, which chairs are in stacks of 8 and which aren't
-Chairs in stacks other than 8's just 'look wrong'
-You get a lot of satisfaction every time you look at the sink that you've just cleaned
-You've become an expert at looking for the joins in carpets to enable easier vacumming of big open spaces
-spending an evening scraping walls no longer sounds like an odd thing to do
-You're starting to come round to the idea that orange sofas with red cushions might not look quite so bad together after all
-You have many new skills to add to your cv, including: making an excellent tea or coffee (even if you don't drink it yourself), lining up chairs in straight lines, being able to carry a tray of wine glasses up/down steps without dropping them, being able to carry a stack of 8 chairs using your knees, mopping floors, being able to read childrens' books upside down (so they can see the pictures), filling up baptistry tanks, oh and did I mention being able to put out chairs in straight lines ?

:-D More seriously though...It's hard to believe year team is coming to an end already. In some senses it has gone by so quickly, yet I had my end of year review today and in other senses so much has happened ! We officially have one and a bit more weeks on year team, and then are off to Romania for 10days to help with a kids camp. Before I started year team people said to me that I would be challenged physically, emotionally, spiritually, and any other -ally's I could think of, but that it would be a good year. I do feel that is very true. But it is so hard saying goodbye to so many people, those that I have worked with for a year as I end my placements this week and next as well as to those who are themselves moving on. I know that this is not, by far, the end but is in fact only the beginning of something, yet I still cannot help but feel an ache in my heart, despite the fact that I know I still have another week.

A song I have found most helpful this week (one which I had in my head during my driving test but has since been used for more than that) is "Well with my soul", or the arrangement of it by Brenton Brown. (I know the context it was written in is very different to how I'm using it, but it nevertheless seems to fit how I'm feeling). It goes:

"Sometimes it's hard, sometimes I cry
Sometimes my heart, wants to know why
But Your yoke is easy, and Your burden is light
And though my heart is aching and there're tears in my eyes

Whatever my lot, You have taught me to know
It is well, it is well with my soul.

It's not always easy, I'm not always right
Sometimes I do things that are wrong in Your sight
But I have decided I'm going to follow Jesus
And there's no turning back, there's no turning back

But please hold my hand Lord, and hold on tight
'Cause the road here is narrow
Yes the road here is narrow"
-Brenton Brown

Whatever I've learnt this year I am not going to just forget. God has been building foundations in me (which implies now building on top of them?!) and I won't be going back. There's no turning back, only keeping on going forwards !

"You call me beautiful"

:-) There's been a lot going on in my head and my heart the last few weeks. Last night I was really encouraged at the last night of the wholeness course (for those of you reading this who don't go to Woodies, this is a 6 week course which "helps people discover their identity in Christ and to resolve issues of past hurts, fears and rejection" and which we had to go on at least once in our year team year.) It was an amazing evening ! (I wrote 8 journal pages on it !) At wholeness, while the talks are good and helpful, they are really (or feel to me to be) simply jumping off points for the ministry times, which for me are the truly valuable thing of the course. It's not frequently that you find a place where you can just sit and be still before God for about an hour (or more), in a darkened church building, where there are people willing to pray for you. Such an amazing resource.

I have found some of the 5 out of the 6 weeks I attended fairly hard going, but I was really encouraged last night. I don't really want to go into details on here, but suffice to say that I was so encouraged, God is very good and He knows me so well ! But I was reminded by several songs and Bible verses last night (it's how my mind works, and how God seems to speak to me!) Two songs in particular struck a chord and seemed particularly relevant and these I will share. Firstly the chorus of a song by Bethany Dillon (one of my favourite songs ever) and a song by Ginny Owens. Have a read and a ponder and hopefully they might encourage you too.


"You make me beautiful,
You make me stand in awe
You step inside my heart,
and I am amazed.
I love to hear You say,
who I am is quite enough,
You make me worthy of love and beautiful"
-chorus from "Beautiful" by Bethany Dillon



"I've been waiting, for a hero who's brave and strong
Someone to love me, someone to tell me I belong.
But I pretend I'm satisfied,
As I stand watching from the sidelines,
Til You pull me in to the light
And say "It's your turn now, welcome to your life!"

And You call me beautiful,
You say You've loved me all along,
And You've always held the keys to unlock my soul
Oh You call me beautiful.

There's a smile on my face and a brand new light in my eyes.
It's a new day, and I've never felt so alive.
I feel as if I could conquer anything,
Oh that's what Your love has done for me,
And now all I want to be
Is everything You say I can be !

Oh You call me beautiful,
Say You've loved me all along
And You've always held the keys to unlock my soul,
But I didn't know.
Now I can finally start to live,
Take these chances I have missed.
Things will be so different,
Now that I know, You call me beautiful.

The story is better than I could dream, after all.
Now this is reality, to know You and to hear You call me beautiful,
call me beautiful !"
-"Beautiful" by Ginny Owens